It was one of those days today when nothing goes quite to plan.

I went out to get my brother's birthday present, and first port of call was the cash point. There were people using both available holes so I took a punt at the one on the right. It soon became apparent that the person in front of me was making a meal of of it and seemed to be all fingers and thumbs. He then kept producing more cards to try, like Jerry Sadowich with a bad magic trick.

As I was already breaching the the subtle rules of cash point etiquette in 'shoulder surfing' this person, I considered pushing into the other growing queue. No matter how hard you may try in this country, queue jumping is impossible. There is more chance of getting a table at The Fat Duck at Bray (even now while it is closed due to a food poisoning scare). Queues turn the most mild mannered people (like myself) into monsters, and I would be unceremoniously thrown out, and have to wander to the back, tail between legs. So no, I was not going there.

Humph.

Eventually the way was clear to extract the spoils of the governments quantitative easing policy (if there is no more cash in the system, just print your own). I feel like we are getting to a point where the money from my ancient Monopoly game is worth more (and the plastic houses more than bricks and mortar).

Suitably flush I went to a card shop. I suppose I am a fairly discerning card buyer, and I found myself staring at a dwindling selection of rubbish designs that have all done the rounds in Cambridge. DIY Potato shapes would be an improvement but do lack a certain maturity I suppose, and online cards just make be feel sick. Yes, why not just farm out all of your family birthdays to a dot com, let them source and send out presents and cards for you. Not a stretch for them to work out your families profiles and intimate likes and dislikes thanks to Facebook et al. and the public proliferation of personal information. Yes indeed, why not take away all of the thought and mechanize your life. Errm...no thanks.

I do however find choosing cards in public a deeply personal experience. Irrationally, the idea of someone else scrutinizing my choices bothers me, I am always in a fluster to get the card and get out as quickly as possible.

I am ranting a bit today, sorry about that, most unlike me. Remainders of a red wine head.

On a positive note the weather now has a spring feel, getting ready for the burst of colour. Sadly this reminded me of an article I recently read on the dwindling bee population.

Einstein famously did not say "If the bee disappears from the surface of the earth, man would have no more than four years to live".

The statement is intensely worrying all the same and holds some truth. Just when I had started dealing with global warming and the credit crunch combined, off buzz the bees. Mobile phones, Colony Collapse Disorder, pesticides and our general interference are all blamed. Thankfully grape vines are wind pollinated, so in a post-bee apocalyptic world, after a hard days pollination with paint brushes, you could still drown your sorrows with a fine Bordeaux from an overflowing European wine lake. The cider drinkers out there really should panic.

The article actually made me buy a share in a bee colony somewhere in Shropshire to help the cause, as I selfishly do not want to lose my apple a day.

I wish quantitative beesing was also possible.

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